"You are truly a good child." Every time I close the final pages of Totto-Chan: The Little Girl at the Window , my heart yearns to meet the esteemed Principal Kobayashi and visit the extraordinary Tomoe School—a place that always discovers and nurtures the precious strengths of its students , cultivating them every day, every hour. Principal Kobayashi and John Dewey shared the belief that "Education is a social process, a development that takes place within the context of a real, dynamic society." In this environment, every child is evaluated in the most humane way: their strengths (or potential strengths) and weaknesses are assessed individually and thoughtfully. You might remember the story of Totto-Chan, who was "expelled" from her first-grade class because: She kept looking out the window, waving at street musicians, and talking to birds. She drew her flag outside the margins of the paper. She was fascinated with opening and closing her des...
These might be the words of a 14-year-old child confronting their mother’s reproach: “Why do I do everything for you, and you never appreciate it?” This statement reflects a deeper truth that many parents may not realize: sometimes, the actions we take for our children are driven by our own desires and expectations, not necessarily their needs. A few days ago, I had the opportunity to converse with several parents and colleagues—psychologists and educators—about a pressing question: What does it truly mean to prepare well for a child’s future? Over the past decade, particularly between 2014 and 2017, the “natural parenting” movement gained momentum, fueled by media and extreme viewpoints. Some believed children should develop entirely freely, without schools or structured education. Others encouraged letting children do whatever they wanted, without rules or boundaries. However, many children raised this way struggled to integrate into society. They lacked essential skills and kno...